Goodies

-ruby and sol went back to swimming today after a 2 month hiatus and did quite well!  Sol had one freak out moment but that's not too bad considering he used to freak out the whole time.

-ruby is either ruby 1 or ruby 2. Have you ever heard the old rhyme "once there was a girl with a pretty little curl right in the middle of her fore head. And when she was good she was very very good, and when she was bad she was horrid."? It fits ruby to a tee. Today she was ruby 1 after a few days of being ruby 2. Yay!  Sweet sweet girl!

-ruby AND sol took at nap. I had an entire hour to myself so I watched project runway and folded laundry. I almost felt guilty for how much I enjoyed it.  Once sol got up he helped me pick raspberries, which we've gotten a lot of this year (yay for jam!) and tomatoes. After we came in he watched a show so I sat down and played the piano for 30 min. Playing the piano is therapy for me.  It felt great.

Just wanted to share those little goodies and this:

When we were visiting my parents in Laramie Sol and Ruby wanted to sleep in ruby's crib together and so I let them. After a few threats they  actually fell asleep.  The picture is upside down and kind of dark, but you get the picture.  My mommy heart melted.  :)

Lest you worry...

I've gotten some super sweet emails and texts from friends who read my last post and worried just a bit about me.  Maybe questioned my sanity.  Don't you worry!  I'm feeling very sane.  :)  I like to vent because it makes me feel better.  Watering my feelings down or making excuses for them kind of defeats the purpose.  So don't you fret - I'm feeling pretty great today!  I only beat my kids once today!   (Lest you worry, I'm kidding)

hugs and kisses,
Megan

Evening Mantra

I'm sitting outside because it's the perfect temperature and after an evening thunderstorm it's been raining off and on in light drizzels.  It smells heavenly. And clean. And I feel myself relax out here. I have been longing for simplicity for weeks. I have a hard time with the pace of life.  Am I just a lightweight? I love to be busy but I feel mentally and emotionally worn. I want to disappear by myself for a few weeks, until I can't stand it any more.   What's wrong with me, really. I'm a mom and I love my children more than anything but lately I've wanted to run and hide from the title.  A title I dreamed of having my whole life.  I think I'm normal. I think I'm burnt out. I've been on a high all spring and for much of the summer but I feel like a plane that runs out of fuel and skids to a stop in the dirt.

I'm tired.  I need to allow my heart it's weak moments. I need to acknowledge my dark times. I'm tired of telling myself to keep going, keep giving, keep pushing.  Stay strong for others. Stay strong for all the others. They all need your strength. God gave you strength so use it Megan.  Well tonight there is no stength.  Just existing. Just rest.  Just breathing.  The earth doesn't need me to live. It breathes without me.  It happens separate from me. It doesn't care if I live or die and tonight that is a relief.  I'm a human. I'm a spirit. And my trials are still new to me.  I will allow myself a few breaths...

cousins

cousins!

cousins, 10 years ago (aw, my boys! their so darn cute!)....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

special cousins.  (still my boys!)

Slip-n-slide

(kind of a weird shot with the water...)

Fun.

My Tri Try

I've shared bits and pieces or maybe chunks and parts of my "magical journey" (wink wink Dave) from major funkiness post Ruby's birth back to happy healthy Megan.

Quick recap of steps:
1.  Decide to be "healthy"
2.  Get Healthy physically
3.  Work out mental issues
4.  Get in shape
5.  Complete a triatholon

Thanks to encouragement from my sister and a good friend willing to train for and do the triathlon with me I found the courage to sign up for a the Women of Steel triathlon.  Its a women only sprint distance tri right in my back yard.  Literally, the course goes right around my neighborhood.

Training
Training was key.  In a triathlon you swim, bike, then run.  Running was my weakest point.  I HATED running.  My right leg is 1/2 and inch longer than my left because of scoliosis and so running has always hurt.  But I was tired of being afraid of it and I knew if I wanted to do the tri I had to overcome my running issues.  So I started running last fall.  It took me a couple months to get to where I could run a mile consistently.  Yep, just 1 mile.  I would get shin splints so badly that I'd have to stop for a week or two.  So it took a couple months for my leg muscles to get built up enough to run a mile a couple times a week.

Then I slowly added distance.  I'd run 1.5 miles for a month, then 2 miles, etc.  It took me nearly 6 months to build up to 3.5 miles.  But that was enough to get me through the race. 

Next I focused on swimming.  I knew how to swim but not how to swim fast.  In fact I've always been quite slow.  So I signed up for a swim class at the local rec center that met at 5:30 am.  Yep.  I just about died.  I'm so lucky my friend decided to take the class with me.  She was the reason I actually went, otherwise I'm sure I would have slept in more than half the time.  We'd get up at 5 to get to class by 5:30.  The rec center pool was in a giant bubble because it was still winter.  The first few times I went I felt like I was in some sort of nightmare.  I'm NOT a morning person.  And to get up at that unholy hour, in the cold, and go in this weird loud bubble into a sort of cold swimming pool just to swim for an hour solid was kind of a nightmare. 

But I loved the teacher and I had my friend to commiserate with.  And after a couple weeks it started to be kind of fun.  Lets not get crazy - it still was torture at times, but it was bearable.

Finally, I started biking when it warmed up enough and discovered that I love to road bike.  I love the speed and the distance you can cover.  I was riding Dave's bike and planned to ride it for the race.  But Dave and kids surprised me with my own road bike for mothers day.  And its even nicer than Daves!!!  I've since named her Penny, and together we can fly!  The biking has come easy, and for that I'm grateful as running and swimming did not.

The Race.
Was really fun.  The training sucked.  But because I trained the race was fun.  It was exhausting but I performed as I hoped I would.  The swim was slow and I probably could have gone faster but I got stuck behind a slow person.  The swim was in a pool so it was very difficult to pass.  I got 105th in the swim out of 160 in my age group.  The bike was so fun.  I passed people the whole way and got 42th in the bike portion.  The run went well.  I was hoping to finish it in 30 min when I basically did.  Overall I came in 84th.  Wahoo!!!

I was happy with that.  The feeling of completing a physical challenge like that is awesome.  Would I do it again?  Yep!  But I haven't wanted to jump right back into training.  I'm hoping to maybe do another in the fall.  

Here are a few pics:

Solomon becomes a "4 boy"!

Solomon has been anticipating, planning, counting down to, obsessing over his birthday since last August when Ruby turned one.  Having to witness, first hand, such spoiling of a sibling is difficult.  I think he channeled his feelings into obsessing over HIS birthday.  Which is a good choice, however its been a long 8 months, especially for a 3 year old!  

When the time finally came Sol planned a Thomas party with a few of his favorite pals.  And he had no hesitations in requesting an elaborate cake by his mother.  I don't know where we set the presidence that birthday cakes are fancy.  I'm no baker but I'm becoming pretty good at the "sheet cake with fancy top" cake.  Thanks to my sis, Michelle and her high school Baskin and Robins skills we whipped out a pretty sweet Thomas cake if I do say so myself. 

 We jumped through all the birthday party hoops.  We had games, which included throw the coal in the engines' baskets, "steamy thomas" (like hot potato) and "Thomas, Thomas, Diesel 10" (like Duck, Duck, Goose)  Super simple - I'm glad I didn't put much thought into these cause the kids were real happy with these simple games.  

 We did presents, colored pictures, and ate cake. 

Contrary to what I believed the last few birthdays, I've learned that less is more!  Especially with preschoolers. 

This was the best picture I got of Ruby.  She and Sol LOVE their uncle Matthew!  Can you see why?

The icing on the cake for Solomon has been his new "Lightening McQueen" bike!  G&G Whipple got him a really cool speedy red bike.  Sol has taken right to it and rides it so well!  

Sol has coined the term "4 boy".  Meaning he's 4 now so he gets to do new things.  Some things are good.  For example "4 boys eat potatoes, not 3 boys but 4 boys do." So he now eats potatoes.  Some times he uses it to get out of stuff.  "4 boys don't have to clean up the toy room."  And he also places other boys in their age cagetigories.  "5 boys go to Kindergarten." 

Solomon is truely a very special boy.  He is so funny.  He's not shy at all.  He talks everyone's ears off.  He assumes everyone loves him and he loves everyone.  Especially his Grandmas.  He is a happy soul, my little ray of sunshine, my sol!